Article:
Rihanna and Chris Brown are proof that domestic violence is everyone’s business
A few weeks after the 2009 Grammys, photos released of R&B soul singer Rihanna’s face after her then-boyfriend Chris Brown had assaulted her were explanation enough as to why she had not appeared at the Grammys just a few weeks earlier. She had been brutally assaulted by Brown.
In a November 2009 interview with Diane Sawyer, Rihanna told Sawyer that it takes “eight or nine” incidents of domestic violence before one leaves an abusive relationship. Moreover, she told Sawyer that “When I realized that my selfish decision for love could result into some young girl getting killed, I could not be easy with that part. I couldn’t be responsible … If Chris never hit me again, who’s to say that their boyfriend won’t … kill these girls”. Rihanna told young girls, “”Don’t react off of love. F love.”
Conventional wisdom was that the relationship was over — Rihanna would become a role model to women around the world, and through her actions, would demonstrate that no man is worth it.
In an August 2012 interview with Oprah Winfrey, Rihanna told Winfrey that she had lost her “best friend” (Brown) in one moment. She said that “It was a weird, confusing space to be in, because as angry as I was … I just felt he made that mistake because he needed help. [And I wondered], who’s going to help him?” Rihanna continued, telling Winfrey that “No one’s going to say, ‘He needs help.’ Everybody’s going to say, ‘He’s a monster. Without looking at the source.’”
Three months later, in her seventh studio album, “Unapologetic,” Rihanna and Brown recorded a song together entitled “Nobody’s Business.”
In the Jan. 31 issue of Rolling Stone magazine, after officially reuniting with Brown, Rihanna told contributing editor Josh Eells, “I decided it was more important for me to be happy. I wasn’t going to let anybody’s opinion get in the way of that. Even if it’s a mistake, it’s my mistake. After being tormented for so many years, being angry and dark, I’d rather just live my truth and take the backlash. I can handle it.”
Then, last week, to the utter shock and dismay of men and women all over the world, Rihanna, blowing kisses at Brown, accompanied him to a probation hearing where prosecutors argued that he had failed to complete his 180 days of community labor, which he had agreed to after pleading guilty to felonious assault in 2009.
As a society, we must ask ourselves what is it that happens in the rearing of children in virtually every culture and at every socio-economic level that raises girls and boys who are willing to stay in, or go back to physically and/or verbally abusive relationships.
But, what about the case of women of means who can leave and choose to stay? What about cases like Rihanna where one leaves an abusive relationship and then chooses to go back to it knowing full well that this self-bondage puts one at constant risk of physical and/or verbal abuse?
Bent-Goodley asserts that what we see with Rihanna and Brown and in numerous incidents of domestic violence is not just one issue, but a combination of many factors. Stigma, not wanting to be associated with domestic violence, fear of losing social stature, cultural beliefs that physical abuse is a normal part of being in a relationship, and romanticizing what your relationship used to be versus what it actually is and whatever is actually going on internally with the individual who has been victimized that leads them to stay (or go back to an abuser), are just some of the many issues we must look at as a nation in order to halt this crime.
Chris, who reignited his romance with Rihanna last year, also revealed details about their relationship, describing it as 'childlike'.
He was sentenced to a five-year probation and six months of community service by a court after admitting to the assault.
-Assault: a violent attack, either physical or verbal
-Selfish: relating to or characterized by self-interest
-Wisdom: the ability or result of an ability to think and act utilizing knowledge, experience, understanding, common sense, and insight
-Role model: a person regarded by others, esp younger people, as a good example to follow
-Weird: suggestive of or relating to the supernatural
-Source: the point or place from which something originates
-Blacklash: a reaction or recoil between interacting worn or badly fitting parts in a mechanism
-Handle: the part of a utensil, drawer, etc, designed to be held in order to move, use, or pick up the object
-Utter: to give audible expression to (something)
-Dismay: to fill with depression or discouragement
-Prosecutors: a person who institutes or conducts legal proceedings, esp in a criminal court
-Pleading guilty: to declare oneself to be (guilty or not guilty) in answer to the charge
-Felonious: involving, or constituting a felony
-Rearing: to care for and educate (children) until maturity; bring up; raise
-Willing: cheerfully or eagerly compliant
-Stigma: a distinguishing mark of social disgrace
Summary: In 2009, after the Grammys, had been known that Rihanna had been another victim of domestic violence, and her boyfriend (Chris Brown) was the guilty. Rihanna said that she was more worried about Brown that about herself because she didn't know if the man needed help. Some month later Chris recognized that he really had assaulted his girlfriend in the car. Finally, he was sentenced to a five-year probation and six months of community service by a court after admitting to the assault.
by Paula Garcia and Sara Olives
